JADED.

i wonder why people have to sing their own praises to make themselves feel good? like here, at my family dinner just now, my aunt came up to my sister, my cousin and i and went:

"my hair nice right? i just styled it."

cue in blank stares to her and knowing glances between ourselves.

"i know now a little flat la, but it has been one whole day already. the customers at the shop says that it's really nice. they like my hair and how i do my make up and my clothes..."

and she walks off.

i mean come on, we're not interested. and this is not the only time. she's like this always.

so, what's with people and their insecurities?

it's something that everyone has and it's something that everyone handles differently. some like my aunt, has to tell how other people has complimented her, or actually is claims to.

others purge others with theirs or they keep on asking things bout themselves like,
"how do i look? is it fine?"

then there are those who complain bout others;

and those who compare themselves.

well, for me i wail to my sister, yes, i wail. haha.

okay, but that's seldom.

okay. i just read back.
why am i talking bout this? so whatever.

i must be truly agitated. too many people doing that first two things. vommiting onto me and comparing themselves and gives oneself compliments.

so yeah.

i'm so happy.
i just got the best deals ever! guerlain, stilla and ysl makeup for below ten bucks apiece. HAHA. damn cool. i'm so happy that i know luxasia people! haha.

and you know what? i don't even have to pay for them! yep! ((:

hmm, fake eyelashes seem tres cool. i tried some like yonks ago. like for this dressy up halloweenish party. it was those really long asymetrical ones. like triangular and long and feathery. it was really fun. haha. but i want some normal ones this time.

and, no this is so not crystin like becoming. i swear i'm:

one) not that superficial.
two) not that bimbotic.
three) don't spend tonnes of money on them and then just keep them or throw them away

okay i don't see how's that relevent, but i wanted a nice number.

okay that was kinda bimbotic, but whatevs.

and, fre, i know what you're think right now after you read this:

"same old manda.." ((:
haha.

okay, i should go. it's a very nonsensical post indeed. so yeah.

nighty night.

damn man. i think i've got half my appetite back. that's so sad! i want no appetite again! haha.

okay, you know what? ignore this post. i'm just being very manja and whingey. so yeah.

xoxo.

spin the damn bottle.

yesterday was crazy. loads of fun tho. my feet are still hurting. and, yesterday marks the first time i ever run around town, barefooted, and so early in the night. HAHA.

topshop//topman fashion show was still disappointing, no difference in that. crazy, waiting in line like that. and for what? a less than ten minute show. so not worth it.

then was off to lucky to have ayam penyet. i have to say, it was definitely better than the last time we were there. and we were off to far east for them to get their airbrushed tatts. HAHA.

my, my, all those stares that we got. hmm, went to sahara for early drinks and shisha, then decided to WALKED to dxo, side tracked to fullerton for a pee. -oh yeah, those poor koi fishes! i'm surprised if they don't die soon- then to the esplanade to have overpriced ice cream, then to hard time finding a cab to get back to sahara. and that funny cabbie who had to pee so badly, then finally getting to sahara, with a poor awful tasting shisha, more drinks, and playing spin the bottle to pass time. having tonnes of people looking, or actually more like glaring at us. we did make tonnes of noise tho. HAHA. but, i see nothing wrong in that tho.

i really had scads of fun, and it did eventually take my mind of things, so yeah, it was good. so thanks people. ((:

and for disclosure, i won't way who those people are. ((:

-

okay, and you know as i nice as i try to be, some people can be that dense. i mean, come on man, you don't want me to blow it up in your face, don't you? do me a favour. and read those subtle hints, please?

-

going out shopping now.

and, should i take up that job?

xoxo.

if only.

my, my, why do i get into this kinda situations? i'm just too nice aren't i? well, i have to say, i'm about this close to losing it. so, please, back off.

-

anyways, you know it sucks so bad what you're doing to me, you know? you've changed so much, i don't think i would ever recognize you. and it sucks that you don't keep your promises no more. i just want to give up and let go, but i can't you know? so, it's so fcuked up.

-

you know what? you woke beasts that weren't meant to be awaken.
i'm just here, wanting for more now.

-

and, you know, it's good to see them like this, my parents i mean. it seems as tho that things for them are working out. at least i hope so. so, here's hoping that i didn't just jinx it.

anyways, i went to hooters yesterday with liza, lily and Ernest Jones, or rather EJ. absolutely hilarious i tell you! my lone loyal supporter! one really cool dude with his gold plated four front teeth and his transparent nike dunks. haha. this is why i love to hang out with people older than me. and, i'll wait for that wedding invite when you turn fifty and when im thirty seven. haha.

oh yeah, so back to hooters, such a disappointment! the girls were skinny; but they are flat at both ends. and that stupid girl liza made me do stupid things. but in the end, you got sucked into it as well, so yeah, HA! HA!

anyways, i owe a phonecall to a waiting meiwen, so yeah,

toodle pip!. ((:

THENAUGHTYGIRLKNOCKSKNEESAGAIN somuchforwillpowerandthathiatus.

i guess, i should stick with being mundane and give you the breakdown of my day in great detail! (hah!)

today has been crazy. met with tommy after the xray. it was fun, but the wait is like so bloody long lah! (the singlish term used purely for your own pleasure) anyways, after that we went to starbucks to chill and have breakfast and to catch a movie. so mrbean it was. THE STUPIDEST MOVIE EVER. remember how i told you guys that it may be early in the year, but i thought that epic movie was the absolute worse movie ever? this is TIMES worse. i don't know why? but tomtom, you always pick the absolute worst movies ever! first was epic movie, the so called "MUST WATCH" show of the year. i don't care! next time i will be the one picking out the movie!

anyways, then we met liza and he went home to do stuff and i went back to the store with her. new employees, and i have to say that crystin is up to her same old "work ethics" she dumping work on her staff again and taking all the credit. well, she's stupid. and she'll always will be. luckily i'm not working with her anymore. and i don't know why, but she def. has some psychic abilities. every time i wanna go down to collect petty cash, somehow she manages to be absent every time. so irritating.

anyways, then i went to meet bj for the first time in two and a half years. my my, you've gotten a little pudgy haven't you? anyways, went to lido to catch happily never after (don't ask; this wasn't my choice either)

all i can say is that i can never show my face in lido again! i can't believe what you made me do! you know it was a kids show and there were kids around? stupid shit. and, that chair broke, it had nothing to do with me! and, the kid was really blowing bubbles in the cinema lah! don't bloody believe me.

anyways, then dinner for him and then we walked and talked and walked some more. we walked from lido to forum to four seasons and continued walking around those housing estates, parks, and then suddenly ended up at river valley. it was crazy, walking in rounds, but it was fun.

and i still can't believe what we did. it's just so weird now; you know? it's so nuts. talk about your fantasy, or rather your prediction came three quarters true. haha.

xoxo.

today just SUCKED.

today i woke up at bloody eightthirty, but i went back to sleep and after about 1876423176 spriodic attempts of -trying as hard as one can possibly- slamming the snooze button.. on my mobile every five damn minutes; i finally woke up at five to ten. i was seriously tired, i only fell asleep at five. anyways, so after making dozens of phonecalls, i went to SATA. i tell you it was fcuking crowded!!! anyways, then, i decided to veto the whole idea of waiting for the hundred and fifty odd to go before me, and decided, on persuasion of my grandpa, to get to a private clinic.

fast forward half an hour:
I WAS STILL BLOODY WAITING FOR A CAB.

when i did finally reach parkway, ALL the clinics were closed for lunch. so after wondering parkway for two hours with my grandpa; i went back, only to find out that the clinic with the xray operating equipment had CLOSED DOWN.

agitated already.

anyways, sidetrack abit. my granddaddy is scaring me. he is really forgetful, it's scary. he's legs and back hurt so bad, you know. it sucks. i accompanied him, the whole day, walking here and there, for him to get things he doesn't really need, for him to close his this bank account. MY, it was a horrendoes experience!! the stupid teller is so dumb that she's stupid!! so irritated with her. NO PATIENCE at all. my grand dad's a little deaf too, so she had to repeat herself, and, he messed up some really, and i mean really, tiny document. more of a payment slips thingy, you know? and she had to get another one. but, so what's the big deal? but, anyways, back on point. he makes me worry so much for him, you know? cause, it's like, he loves to go out, and he seems so stiffled if he doesn't. maybe a bike ride to marine parade or something. but, to think he's so like this, and like that, it scares the hell out of me, to imagine what might happen...

so, moral of the story is, don't imagine.

okay, so, anyways, they said that the nearest xray centre would be at bedok, so there i was, trying to flag for a cab there. so anyways, the bloody selfish cab driver who wanted to go makan, dropped us of at some conveniently unknown area, so that he could park his cab. okay, before i go on, THIS IS COMPLETELY TRUE! okay? tho, it may seem a little far fetch about the cabbie. so, anyways, we were left to wonder around bedok for half an hour. i had absolutely no idea where the bloody princess theatre was. and, the stupid girl at watsons told me the wrong directions which made us go back to where we started from. i was HOT, THIRSTY and RAVENOUS by this time, around two thirty. i hadn't eaten or drunk anything at all and i didn't eat dinner the night before. so, as you can imagine, i was super cranky. anyways, when we finally found the xray centre, they said that the can't allow me to do a stupid xray.

so, i was pissed, and just walked out of there and went home.

ate left over meesiam and wanted some badly needed sleep.

but, no, when i was finally dozing off, my grandma made me go to my own private doctor to do the tests.

no mood at all lah!

and she didn't allow me to pee before i go!

so i was cranky and bloated.

luckily, i never meet any of you.

but, anyways, tomorrow i'm off to that bloody xray centre again.

so bloody infuriated the whole day.

anyways, just to say, i had to do that (: with the whole singlish accent. HAHA. ((: so, it's not all me! haha.

anyways, i have to say, i went almost all out bonkers that late, late night. haha. but, it was positively delicious, if you know what i mean? spamming, making stupid shit out of no where. it was fun. ((:

and, to freda. don't worry. i think it's gonna be fine. i told you in that msn thing, so hopefully you'll get it when you come online again.

i don't know what's wrong with me, but my head's all spasmmy today. what's wrong again....
anyways, super hungry, gonna get something to eat! ((:

before i leave, i guess i should reply to my taggs here for today. at least i won't run out of space halfway, and i have the UPPERHAND! haha. ((:

to mwen and steven:
BOTH OF YOU ARE NUTS. but, it is entirely hilarious. it made me laugh today. you guys are so cute! haha.

meiwen, yeah, i know, i wasn't meaning it that context, as you know, i meant to give myself hell, but surprisingly, i didn't, i just laughed some more! haha. ((:

steven, just stick it out. okay? it'll be fine. well, if it isn't, there's always the internet! and, no i wasn't hinting anything sexual or pornographic here, just means that you'll always have us a phone away! haha. ((:

haha, and meiwen, you like have a magnetic attraction to drunk underaged people!! haha. anyways, are you going for dxo? it's always full of mutts and mynahs. (no offence), but if you go, i don't mind. is it another underaged thing?

and, is it in the morning this time round?

haha, and yeah, i amaze myself sometimes with the amount of profanity escaping out of my mouth. and yes, escaping is the right word. ((:

and, anyways, the lyrics are:

(and, you want to sing don't know the lyrics how can!?!)
-that was intended and not the way i usually speak, just a word of caution for those of you who think..-

"We doin' things that the girls don't do
The boys stare, we smile back
All my girls in the rainbow Cadillacs, yeah
.....
Bet you ain't never seen
Chicks ridin' this clean
Louis Vuitton seats
We do it deadly
This how we keep it poppin'
Make sure that bass knockin'
So when you see us ridin'
We call it show stoppin'

We show stoppin'
We show, show stoppin'
We show stoppin'
We show, show stoppin'
That's how we keep it poppin'
Make sure that bass knockin'
So when you see us ridin'
We call it show stoppin' "

THERE! hah! ((:

and i love xoxo too!

so here goes;

xoxo.

[haha((:]

and oh yeah, i'm not gonna comment about all the fcuking and sucking that's going on my tagboard. so juvi! haha! ((: so, i'll pretend that i didn't see them at all! haha. =)

so here goes another entry full of crap! ((:
enjoy.

just a little out of me today.

thank you babes, for asking about me. yeah, strange i've been today. you guys know me so well. jac, nat. ((:

jac, no i'm not depressed. but thank you for hearing me out. i really needed someone to hear it, besides my journal. listening to your indo songs. feeling damn emo now.

yeah, i really should close the book in this part of my life and move on to my new phase of life without looking back.

but, you know what they say about it being easier said then done?

if you an example, look at me: prime example numberONE.

this is really shitty. so, please give me the reasons, the explainations so i can close the book on you. more than ever, you are really full of shit you know that. you make me feel so fcuked up about myself. and i had never let anyone do that to me. not anyone who is not blood-related anyways.. and well, besides that arsehole, which everybody knows and hate. [please tell me, those who are reading out there, that you know who. well, unless you're some anon person.. well, heck, whatevs.] i don't know. feel so bloody confussed you know. so, i really just want to stick it up to you.

anyways, i miss you jac. i know. i totally agree with what you said. thankyou for listening yeah. i really appreciate it. and your advice too and stating the blatant obvious to me. haha. yeah. why aren't we closer? why didn't we ever got any closer than what we were before? i know. it's a pity ain't it. but, there's still now. ((:

and, now, why do those damn poeple with insecurity issues come hound me? they should really just get together and be insecure together. fcuk.

and, anyways, it's not that i don't feel insecure at times, who doesn't, but seriously, please get a grip.

-oh yeah, mr yang is getting married! in june. haha. CONGRATULATIONS! he's really one heck of a lovable guy. and he deserves it

p.s. i notice the nuances of change in my writing. it sucks. profanity, emofied.

okay, i really need to be back to my old self.

I WANT TO BE SANE AGAIN!!

i want to cry, i want to have all the hurt vanish, i want to not care. someone please tell me how. take everything away from me. my worries, my rage, my hurt, my confussion. it's bad, so bad that i'm beginning to have my dizzy spells and headaches.

PLEASE SOMEONE HELP ME.
where's superman when you need him?

cheeeebyeeee.
xoxo;
mandy.


i'm officially sorry if i pissed anyone off today okay. i just don't have it in me to aplease every single goddamn one of you.

yeah, there goes it. from confussion to hurt to anger.
vivious cycle 101.

it'll multiply your orgasm guaranteed.

my, my. i'm so full.

so much so i feel like puking.

okay. definitely running tomorrow.

anyways, i got this extremely weird text from some unknown person:

"URGENT! male tutor 2 tame my notti sch gals!"

that's it, word for word.

WTH, right?

why do people purge me with such things? i don't know how i don't why. it's so repulsive!

anyways, not much happened today. but my week to come is going to be super full. i don't know how to slot in ellie's and nadine's tuition.

anyways, i wanna watch the phantom of the opera; BUT NO ONE WANTS TO WATCH IT WITH ME!!! not per se, but in the sense that they don't want to fork out the money to pay for it. the only person who i know is going to catch it is meiwen, and she's watching it with her sister and friends, and for one of those "special" times, my mother is willing to pay for me!!

so, true to it's nature, it's one of those times again, where i can go//have it//or whatever, and there's no one to go//do it//or whatever with! it's so damn frustrating!

so, does anyone wants to go with me? ((:

xoxo.

horoscopes and ex-rays (pun fully intended)

The Bottom Line
Get rid of the undesirable things in your life -- toss what (or who) isn't working.

In Detail
Just as you'd peel an avocado or scrape a sticky price tag off a new vase, today you have to work to get rid of some undesirable things in your life. Toss out what isn't needed, what doesn't feel right and what isn't flattering. This could include something as simple as a pair of old shoes or as complicated as a romantic partner who just doesn't have his or her heart in your relationship. Kick it to the curb and walk away -- without looking back!

what is it that make them so real, like it's really part of your life. like it really means something and and reflect you. i can't tell you how reflective is that horoscope _____ [i don't know what is it called. prediction? reading?...whatevs.] on my life right now. i haven't been touching them for the longest of times; i was just bored today and clicked on the fs horoscope thingy and that popped out.

weird.

i need to get to the doctor's asap to get a medical check up. latest monday. xray and all. cool ain't it? so maybe i have to rain check on that outing or maybe hold it off till a little later.

i remembered the last time i did an xray was when i was i think if i'm not wrong primary two or three, when i swallowed a dollar coin. [yes, i really did. well, to do me justice i was young and... yeah, well, whatever.] anyways, the story goes as this. i was waiting for my maid to finish her chores to bring me out to get some icecream [some things never change huh? haha. ((:] and i began playing with the dollar coin. like throwing it up in the air and catching it. then, i decided to do something ____[i don't know what to call it, so you can fill up that space with anything suitable - and i said suitable, not something dirrty. don't think i don't know some of you guys out there! AND IF YOU'RE THINKING IT'S YOU, IT PROBABLY IS! (haha)] and try to catch it with my mouth. yes, eventually i did, and look where it got me...

the coin got lodged in my throat, and before you guys start saying why don't you cough it up, believe me i tried, but all that did was cause friction and i coughed out blood, i remember that clearly cause of the distinctive red splats of blood against the pearly white sink and i got a little woozy. yes, at that age i was still a little freaked out by the sight of blood. (but you know something wierd, is that as i grew older i always loved to suck my own blood when i got any cuts - no not a vampire here, tho it'll be a good costume, haha.)

okay, one should stop deviating.

anyways, off i was to the E.R. of changi hospital. and i believe i couldn't speak cause it had hurt too much. and it was there where i had my first xray. man, i felt so violated. like the guy who was mending the thing could literally see through me, through my clothes.

yes, i was that sexually oriented even tho i was that young [HAHA! ((:]

and, now you know what my friend said? you have to take everything off for the xray.
(okay still deviating, i know)

okay, back to my story. anyways, the doctor said it was okay and it'll just pass out in my shit. i know, so bloody anti-climatic right? anyways, so, from then i had to shit in a bloody god damn potty and had to poke through it to find a coin. anyways, after weeks, and shooting up liquid up my arse for shit to come out, (graphic i know) the coin was not found tho the next xray had shown that the coin was no longer in my system. so, i still wonder, where the hell did the coin go to?

haha.

well, that marks an end to a very nonsensical, redundant and wordy story of a tiny part of my life as a _____ young kid.
(i think the right word would be playful and curious here, but you still can take the liberal creativity to fill it up yourselves. haha.)

anyways. i have to apologize for that disgusting and repulsive images you had seen [from the earlier post].
which had spoilt you breakfast//lunch//dinner for your entire lives, as meiwen put it so eloquently. haha.

so, off i go. ((:

p.s. sorry for the pictureless entries. my can is currently in taipei and the system has so many glitches, the biggest one that it refuses to be accessed.

and that xuan refuses to send me the long overdue photos as well. ((:

p.p.s. what the hell is girl poaching anyways?

xoxo.

(anyways, sorry for the lame attempt to bring some colour and life into my post.)

WAIT!; why am i apologizing anyways?

okay whatevs.

anyways, before i go i heard that the MOMO party is in the afternoon. well, if it truly is. all i have to say is
THAT'S JUST PLAIN SAD!
haha.

okay, now i really should bugger off.

OH MY GOD.

CHEAP MUCH?

http://www.friendster.com/37706135

damn sick.
was i seeing right or was she fingering herself in one of those pictures?

EWW.

this another one:

FUCKING DESPERATE
i tell you.

http://www.friendster.com/user.php?uid=22004383

FCUK. these kinda people exist?

i'm officially disgusted.

okay. as everyone knows, i'm the most duddest of all computer duds. so you can copy and paste on the address bar.
seriously sick.
i didn't even know that such people existed.


my stupid friend,
how the hell did you actually come across such things?
you know you ruined my lunch?


hmm, on second thought, maybe i should thanking you instead. ((:

killing me softly.

my, oh my. i have no idea what came over me today. so don't ask. maybe it's just too much things happening at once. and all of it which i don't have any grasp in. no control whatsoever. so maybe that's it. losing control. i remember i once said that i wanted to be able to lose control. but, not in this way. this is just losing control, losing so much control till you spinning control. i don't know what's going on in almost every perspective in my life, and i don't like it one bit. i don't like it at all in fact. i know i'm repeating myself; i guess it's just some justification, i guess.

i want to be back in control. no more second guessing. no more wondering. no more asking myself whst i've done wrong, why is this happening to me if i'd done nothing at all to deserve this. no more, holding back. but, i still think, still ponder. i want that to stop, so why doesn't it?

i wish i could, oh man how i wish i could just go far, far away from this place, get a well deserved, -or maybe not so much of a well deserved- rest just to sort out my thoughts, free my mind and free myself; you know the much talked about losing control; the good one? to have that. be away from this civillisation. but, somehow, i think, even tho i am 458993228565 miles away, i would still be thinking about here.

so what the hell gives?

i wish to have my brain and heart transplanted out from me for just a sec, so that i can take a breather, and then, for them to be placed back into me again.

boy, if only that could happen, it would be the sweetest escape ever.

can you imagine. not thinking about anything. not worrying about anything for just that one moment. wouldn't that be fun?

and, no, before any of you can think further than that, i'm not suicidal. i repeat, i'm NOT suicidal.

well so much for that. most of all, i wish i could stop thinking about you.

my mom's on a roll. she's planning to make life for me as she possibly can. she woke me up at eleventhirty, tho she knew i slept at nine thirty, in the morning mind you, not at night. don't ask why. well, that actually's the least of it. but two hours of sleep. man i felt like dying.

running yesterday surprisingly took my mind off things, but, i'm not sure it's any better. it brought my attention to my aching knees. my, i didn't know it was that bad. now everytime i sit, stand, climb stairs or actually just walk, it hurts. so this morning, when i woke up, they were screaming bloodymurder.

anyways, on with better news. my auntie is willing to sponsor for my trip-before-school thing. she's thinking somewhere cool, like japan or korea, well, why not right? but, i really wanted to go some place "beachy" but, who's to complain? right?

well, but i know for a fact that i think i'll have a semi-terrible time with her. all i have to say is that she's the one who always like to butt into things and make everything loads worse. she is that saccharine little bitch who has many faces, you know the kind, don't you? and, well, i don't quite see eye to eye with her. but, since she's sponsoring me, who's to complain, right?

here's hoping that it won't be a terrible time.

anyways, MEIWEN'S back!. ((:
haha.

total nuts becoming.

this is so entirely bad. so much till i'm questioning myself over and over again. it's crazy at home; and the things i really shouldn't be caring about here is suddenly thrust upon me. i wonder how much more i can actually take before my breaking point.

okay, lighter matters.

this past week has been, quite fun actually. my dates with my new and improved babe has been scads and scads of fun. just what i needed baby. thanks so much. i don't believe i ever laughed quite that much in such a long time. so it was definitely what both of us needed. and can you believe that crappy security guard who kept lurking by and finding every opportunity to speak to us? i think he was so interested in you. it can't be me and my big assets as i was SO covered up. so it must be you.

haha. it feels like primary school all over again. ((:

and you know what, you don't need her. you'll always have me! haha. but seriously speaking, if she gives you that much grief, think about it, is it worth it at all? and, i just don't want to see you getting hurt and disappointed again. it's not the first time and you know it. so yeah.
remember, only a phone call or message away.

then that was that class outing on friday. met up with the girls. it was really something. fun like before in school, only not that much stress anymore. what were we thinking, speaking so loudly about such naughty stuff. i'm surprised we didn't get apprehended. after that, the boys. my have they changed! well, at least most of them are off to tp, just like me, so i'll have some company! since meiwen didn't get in. haha. anyways, next time i promise, that i would wear more sensible shoes. haha.

and, have a safe trip D.Tay. and have fun sharing a room with steven in sydney. i'll visit you guys when i go there. hopefully soon.

i really need to get out of the country. since my auntie is willing to pay for my ticket anywhere nearby, i really wouldn't mind taking a short trip to Australia or maybe Bali or Phuket. i miss bali and phuket. everything's so peaceful and cheap there. or maybe aussie, i can repeat what i did the last time i was there. plus, with tonnes of new friends made there, i can visit them. so yeah, weighing the options. maybe hongkong? supposedly the shopping there is real good. that's from meiwen and xuan anyways.

speaking bout that. planning to head out to desaru with them, i mean xuan, freda and wendy, probably after xuan's o's. just for a couple of days. i mean, it's a cheap ferry to get there, with a bungalow with a beautiful golf course as your backyard and the beach just a buggy ride away, who wouldn't want it?

maybe could invite more people too. it'll be tonnes of fun. and, i guess my family can take the neighboring one, so they can settle their nerves while keeping their beady eyes on me. but, who would want to put your friends to such torture?

just have to check it with my parents tho, and i guess that would definitely be tough. trust issues again. there you go.

hmm, maybe for my eighteenth birthday party. wouldn't that be a blast?

anyways, to natalin. hope your leg gets better soon, and thankyou for being such a loyal reader. HAHA. reading my boring archives and all that. HAHA. ((:

you know what? i really must be seriously delirious of ever thinking about this. it wouldn't happen in a 5469216564378 years. why am i wasting my time on this beats me, but i just can't seem to get it//you out of my mind. so what is one to do, i wonder. so God, if you are hearing this, please send me some divine enlightenment.

i know this is an extremely wordy entry. to make up for all those lost days. haha.

xoxo.

p.s. FREDA. i hope you get your present real soon. i absolutely cannot believe how expensive it is to send a parcel to LA. it's unbelievable. so, enjoy! ((:

randomness.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY FREDA!
i send all my love from singapore to LA babe!
i'm so happy for you and i'm sorry i can't be there to celebrate with you.
hope you have loads of fun and don't study too much on your day.
have a tiny slice of cake for me.
(tiny cause one is trying to shed some weight)
miss you babe.
((:

-this was actually a longer post, but blogger is seriously fucked up.
and i had to bloody redo this post.
so, the rest would be on another time.
hmm, maybe i should switch to lj.

shite.

well, all i have to say is, here i go again.

bridge.

okay. i finally learnt how to play bridge; and i have to say that i'm not too brilliant at it; but, to do me justice it's my first time playing! so, i have an excuse! haha. hmm, but none the less, it's really addictive! okay.

what's with me and exclaimations marks?

okay..

anyways, today, we had a two hour lunch at marmalade pantry. my god, i've never been so full before since that morton's incident.

oh yeah, thinking of mortons, then to my birthday, i really need to send that email to that private jeweller, who is willing to pay me tonnes of money for some freelance work! HAH. don't you love that. tho, i'm one and a half months late, hopefully he still remembers me. ((:

okay, anyways, i have my mind set on another pair of jeans at mwen's workplace, tho i'm kinda regretting buying those diesel jeans on impulse. but, it's a nice pair of plain grey skinny seven jeans. so yeah. plus fortypercent off i think. so yeah! definitely getting them. ((:

speaking of shopping, on pedder is having a sale!! fifty to ninety percent off!! YAYS! ((:

there i go again with the exclaimation marks.. somebody please stop me...

oh yeah, marmalade pantry. my, the food is scrumptious and filling, tho a little oily. especially love their vanilla bean icecream. with the sticky date pudding. yum.

i know, i know, my posts are still very disjointed, but whatevs.

hmm, then it was to starbucks to chill and play bridge. love that game. ((: tho, it did take me some time to learn, but... it's natural. ((:

seriously speaking, my mom's really being a bitch.

anyways, i'm giving tuition to my brother and sister. how fun would that be? but, i'm so not looking forward to it. my brother who's such a brat and, has such a short attention span and wants to be spoonfed all the time; and, i think my sister and i will spend more time argueing. i think. so yeah.

i think i should stop spending money. it's really too much. even tho it's my own money... but, it's like tonnes.

okay, my english is going down the drain, i've been speaking to too much of the wrong kind of people already.

anyway, i'm going, so yeah. till next time.